Anger can either create more suffering or it can burn through everything false leaving us with the raw truth.
Anger is not a “negative” emotion by itself. We have been taught to believe that anger is wrong no matter what the situation is. But when we see it as just an energy that is moving in and through us, we can normalize it and learn to use it skillfully.
It is normal to feel anger at injustice, harmful actions and situations that create emotional pain or physical insecurity for us. Anger is useful in drawing clear boundaries that protect us from some harm. We can draw boundaries using skillful communication skills and action.
Internally we can get to know anger a little more. If fear is holding you back from getting to know anger, you can take it for a walk and move your body so to bring the intensity of the anger down enough so you can explore it. How does anger feel in the body? What happens to your breath when you are angry? What sort of thoughts feed the anger to become bigger than it needs to be? Why are those thoughts feeding the anger? What does anger need in this moment?
This exploration can be done if the anger is between a 1-5 rather than a 5-10. When the anger energy is very “intense”, it can burn us up inside and burn up everything and anyone in our path. This is suffering, because it creates instant harm and then regret starts to follow along with guilt and shame. Especially when our anger has created harm for the people we love and to our own bodies. It can also sever relationships, leaving the person who has a very large intensity of anger to feel alone, as if no one understands them.
When we become aware of our anger, in a mindful way, we can allow the anger to be there without reacting in ways that we regret. Not judging our anger can help to connect with it so we can use it in constructive ways. Sometimes this includes exercising and physical activity that helps is to stay healthy and gives the anger a release. Sometimes it includes advocacy and fighting for the rights of individuals that are oppressed or advocating for causes that are dear to our heart. It can also be about finding creative outlets such as art, writing and music to allow ourselves the expression of anger to make changes in the world.
Underneath our anger, sometimes we can sense into an underlying sadness and hurt. Anger can sometimes be masking other emotions because they are too difficult to feel. In order to get to know what that is, we can ask ourselves wisely; Is sadness and hurt creating anger? If so, how can we attend to the sadness and hurt so that anger does not burn us up inside?
To suffer less, we cannot avoid anger. But we can treat it with compassion and learn the lessons we need to in order to transform it. This takes patience and time and trust in the fact that every emotion, including anger has something to teach us if we let allow it.
Looking into suffering 